iPhone 3G Sucks Review

I don't have one, but I'm going to act like I do. I don't even have the old iPhone, in fact, I don't even own a cellphone (what is this 2002?).

Upon opening it is it shiny and plasticky. It even smells expensive. The best part about the whole experience is it wasn't packaged in that annoying blister pack crap. I always end up cutting my thumbs or breaking open my cuticle with those things. Kudos to Apple for not going cheap.

I'm somewhat disappointed that apple didn't include the puzzle game. That always was my favorite part about Macs. I don't have much experience with Macs beyond the puzzle game, oh, and Marathon, but I try to block that out best I can.

Hands down the coolest thing you can do with the iPod phone is make calls... when your outside... without.. a cord... to other.. . people... who are... outside.

On a side note one of my favorite things to do is when I see a person on a cell phone in public I try to find another person on a cell phone then imagine that the two are talking to each other, from like 20 feet away. It makes me laugh. I mean, get off the phone. Your 20 feet away!

So the iPhone 3G has 3 more Gs than the orginal iPhone. And that's important because people rank each other based on how many Gs they have. You don't think so? Just listen to a rap CD. They always go on about how many Gs they have, and how they are the orginal G, and "it's nothing but a G thing, baby." Rappers don't lie. Ever. Except Snoop Dogg. He lied once.

Finally there is no cut and paste. What is this 2002?